swim clowns
ironkav
Posts: 259
in General Chat
I coined a new term for some people at my pool. "Swim clowns". I was doing a 500m time trial last night to get an idea of how far I've progressed in 2 months. So I entered the pool and went over to the "fast lane" as I am confident of not holding people up and I dont take 30 mins rest after each length (like the alpha males in coneheads book).
Anyway I am in the middle of the set and swimming on the left of the lane (clockwise lane swimming) and all of a sudden I meet Clown No 1 head on literally. This guy is ploughing down the middle of the lane aggressively. OUCH! I have to stop in the middle of the pool to adjust my hat, goggles and my temper.. Anyway i swim on trying to get back into rhythm. This guy is incredibly slow which reminds me of me 2 months ago, but at least i knew it and went into slow lane. I am catching him every 3 lengths and at the end of the length where I am just behind him, he stops on the left hand side (which he has figured out now) and swims diagonally across my path and over to other side completely cutting me off and kicking me in the shoulder in the process.
Very annoying. Anyway managed 13min 52 secs for 500m which is good for me, Ive cut 6 mins off my last TT.
Oh clown no 2 was the girl who walked through the lanes in front of everyone. It didn't effect me but she did make around 5 people stop.
I met the guy in the sauna afterwards and explained the swim lane ethic to which he replied "get over it" and walked out..
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!! [:@][:@][:@][:@]
Anyway I am in the middle of the set and swimming on the left of the lane (clockwise lane swimming) and all of a sudden I meet Clown No 1 head on literally. This guy is ploughing down the middle of the lane aggressively. OUCH! I have to stop in the middle of the pool to adjust my hat, goggles and my temper.. Anyway i swim on trying to get back into rhythm. This guy is incredibly slow which reminds me of me 2 months ago, but at least i knew it and went into slow lane. I am catching him every 3 lengths and at the end of the length where I am just behind him, he stops on the left hand side (which he has figured out now) and swims diagonally across my path and over to other side completely cutting me off and kicking me in the shoulder in the process.
Very annoying. Anyway managed 13min 52 secs for 500m which is good for me, Ive cut 6 mins off my last TT.
Oh clown no 2 was the girl who walked through the lanes in front of everyone. It didn't effect me but she did make around 5 people stop.
I met the guy in the sauna afterwards and explained the swim lane ethic to which he replied "get over it" and walked out..
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!! [:@][:@][:@][:@]
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Comments
Or, wait for him to get to your end and suggest that you divide the lane in half ie. "you swim on the left and I'll swim on the right....." I do this occasionaly if theres a doddery old fart in the lane I'm in.
Anyone have any comment on my times??
My vengance was to wait for them to get to the middle of the lane, and kick very aggresively in water so that they got a good face/ mouthful of highly chlorinated water. They therefore stopped halfway up and can't put their feet down without drowning. Very effective.
I should mention that these people were billy breaststrokers who don't even put their head in the water and for whatever reason decide that they are good enough swimmers to swim in the lane where the fast people should be...... I hate them all.
evil laugh!!! I Like
As for the slow people, I know this is mean, but well when you pass him, just keep squeezing him over more and more into the barriers and eventually he'll be forced to stop. Repeat every 3 laps until he just gets the point that there are other places for people that can't maintain an average pace in the lane they're in.
Im on leave at the moment so went down to the pool yesterday for an hours "uninterrupted" swimming.
The chances of this seemed high when I saw there were only three others in the six lanes. I had a lane (the fast lane) to myself and I loving the peace, not a soul to wind me up.
Anyway after about 40 mins Mrs Breaststroke jumps in (Even through there are 3 empty lanes) and continues to swim against the advise on the sign. As was mentioned earlier, head out of the water, legs almost dragging the ground, its was more trawling than swimmming.
As it was quiet I was only mildly annoyed, but annoyed still each time I had to overtake (again about every 3 lenghts) and I had to swim the wrong way round to avoid another near head on innicedent.
Then, as if that wasnt enough she took a break standing right in the centre of the shallow end making it a little awkward to turn, grr! On our scond visit just as I was about to turn she casually kicked off screwed me completely. I was fu*king furious!
In the end I moved over to the medium lane and carried on as I had the 10 mins before that idiot entered the water.
Im not annoyed by bad swimming, im annoyed but peoples complete lack of awareness, they seem to be so stuck us their own as*es they dont give a hoot about whats going on around them.
Rant over.
Kav, you sound like your doing pretty well in the pool, knocking 6 mins off is a good effort. Its quite possible you could knock another couple of seconds off a length if you can banish one of the most common problems, sinking legs, do you find you back half sinking in the water? I certainly used to until a friendly swimmer gave me this a few tips to combat it.
As you lungs are full of air(hopefully) the top bit of your bodys is boyant but because of body position (head up or looking forward) in the water you legs drop making more drag as you swim. I was told to try swimming downhill, head looking down into the water (takes a while to get used to breathing) and push your chest down a little. Doing this lifts the legs and makes everything more efficient.
I may be preaching to the converted with you Kav, but thought it may be of use to someone else in not.
If you go with a mate he/she can see if its working. Your legs should now be just below the water.
G
Thanks
There are only two lanes in the pool - "fast" and "medium". The main area is just people not doing things in lanes, larking around etc. etc - just human soup with the meat/vegetables bobbing around aimlessly.
So I go in the medium lane.
If I do front crawl then I am going faster than other people. And, only sometimes, because I'm not very good at judging things I bump into people in front. Which completely throws me. Sometimes, I get flustered just or run out of form, so have to drop down to what, for me, passes as breast stroke. Then I go slower than the people in the lane.
I tend to stop at the ends - not so much to get my breath back - but to wait for the end of the train to come round so I can get on the back of it - without worrying so much about being in the way.
Anyway, I'm sure to an outsider I might look as they I am stopping all the time, and messing about a lot - very bad FC followed by very bad and slow breast stroke.
But I'm doing my best not to get in the way. Honest.
Your are not a clown. This is now a fact. Do not think otherwise.
The clowns are those where they are mediocrely (is that a word?) and use the fast lane as a means of going up and down the pool without the pesky rats (sorry kids) getting in their way. They then insist on being a billy breaststroker and do not ever put their head in the water and if its a woman will almost certainly have mascare on that is now running down their face as if they had been crying.
The clowns don't realise that for those wishing to improve/ go faster than the billy stroker then the fast lane is not for the billy breaststroker.
I am similar to you Jack where I get bloody well fed up having to stop at the end of a length not because I want to but because I need to so that I can time my run to perfection thus enabling me to splash like mad as I pass them... refer to my prev post for my means of evil.
Jack, the fact that you are concerned about it and choose the slower of the two lanes available means you are not a clown. It's the people that get in the wrong lane (too fast or too slow) when there is a more appropriate lane available, and/or stop after every length for more time than they spent swimming, stand in the middle of the end of the lane normally talking to a fellow idiot and couldn't care less that are swim clowns.
Look in the mirror and repeat 3 times..
"I am Jack. and I am not a swim clown"
IK
Well done IK. Going in the right direction.
I notice no one did comment on your times?
According to my maths thats about an 11 minute 400?
Sorry dude but that is quite slow.
I did a pool tri last year and that would have put you about 4th last out of the water.
However remember where you've come from!!! It's a journey keep going...
A 6 minute improvement is great!!!!
G
and if you were thinking that you were considerably faster than me its because i was doing drills to improve my technique to move effortlessly through the water and not create a bow wave equivilent to that of a cross channel ferry as you were with all your thrashing...
oh, and yes i have seen you on the treadmill, next time i see you on it again i will appear on the one next to you....they are not limited to 9kph you know!!!!
RANT over....
I know.. its tough it a 20m pool with clowns..hard to get going at decent pace.
Im doing another TT saturday in a 50m pool, should give me more accurate timings.
Considering i couldnt swim a couple lengths 2 months ago im happy
Big pat on the back for you methinks!
According to my maths thats about an 11 minute 400?
Sorry dude but that is quite slow.
G Harv,
Have to say that you are wrong, you missed the point of the thread.
Iron was going faster than the others in the lane, so if you think he's slow then god knows what the other guy was like. You shouldn't criticise either cause his time is not bad, especially as he says there is a clown in the lane. Perhaps the time would've been better had it not been for this guy.
Iron,
Keep up the good work.
I had asked for some feedback on my time so happy for the support and the criticism.
Thanks for the backup though.. hehehehe
IK
Didn't think my response was harsh? Asked for an opinion and gave one.
Read the last 2 lines??
i also do some drills to improve stroke and had 1 lesson to fix up any flaws and get some tips.
IK
Exactly my problem! I start ok, but as I swim along my legs and/or butt start to sink and I have a lot of drag. Today I tried the downhill swim and push my butt up, but I get problems with neck pain (maybe I try too hard?) and breathing as my head is nearly 3/4 under water.
Anyway, need to figure out a way to fix it, as I am still only slightly faster FC than BS. Focused on FC today and covering distance, so managed 28 out of 30 laps FC in a 36 meter pool, sets of 200 meters at a time.
The guys in the fast lane next to me just swam 'effortless', a real joy to watch, they are skimming over the surface, I was envious ....
-Tom
Keep going Kav.