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the grumpy ol' triathlete's (+wannabe's) corner

there must probably be threads like this all over the place but hey, lets add one more what harm can it do? none in my books just help vent frustrations of all form, shape and nature out so here i go....
1. weather, mother nature i really wanted snow when i was putting my xmas tree up and on xmas eve i would have loved some fluffy white stuff, while "i'm dreaming of a white xmas" would play on the background - now i am over it and really clashes with all my plans so can you stop sprinking please, we had enough already!
2. breaststrokers: get out of the fast lane - people using floats to practice kick drills: get out of the medium lane - loved up couples fondling each other: get out of the slow lane and get a room! ----- people who cannot swim at all get out of the pool altogether and go to the swallow childrens one!
3. faffing...am i the only one faffing about every morning? i waste an hour trying to organise the bag - loose the swim gear, replace with the running gear, not forget anything (randomly achieved) - and on top of that walk about in the world like and endurance athlete on action or a commando in a battlefield...
4. choice..i know having choice is a good thing but having too much is a nightmare...even getting a light for the bike is a several days of research on the internet operation - how about 10 of everything? or sites with better and more filtering options: no, listing stuff by higher or lower price does not help me because i want a red one so i still have to go through 15 pages!!!
5. lakes, rivers, ponds, the thames, the serpentine etc.. can someone please warm them up a bit, clean them from the algae, oil, dirt, cars & other random objects, flora and fauna, recolour them turquoise blue, and throw some tropical fish in for good measure so the swim part of my race and my training are more of a nemo-esque experience?

>>>> ok, that will do for a start, i am sure more will come to me during the day...ahh, i feel better already!
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Comments

  • jibby26jibby26 Posts: 261
    sporteve wrote:
    loved up couples fondling each other: get out of the slow lane and get a room!
    I'm with you on that one, but you only have them in the slow lane? I have seen them in the general swim area, in the medium lane and across the lane rope between the fast and medium lane. Whats worse is the 60-70 year olds doing it, as if swimming hard didn't already want me to puke my guts up.
  • sportevesporteve Posts: 141
    i know jibby, its like the pool is their social meeting point ...
    how can you do a 1000m time trial when you are forced to turn 2 metres before either end of the pool because it's occupied by the lovers, the flirters, the chatters and the loiters?

    and the pool staff? i can use 2 different pools with my card: at one of them they absolutely dont care what anyone does on any lane - while at the other they have a thing about the fast lane from where i was kicked out once trying to do a TT because i was apparently slow for the lane!....slow that is, in comparison to the the ones who go out for a lap like demented lizards on speed and then 'rest' for 15 minutes ... and all that while the slow lane was packed with 'gossipers' and 'floaters' plus a a crazy 'diver' hovering at the bottom of the pool like a stingrey and the medium lane had about 7 girls in bikinis doing breaststroke and paddling along assisted by the floating boards .....how can you win? even more how can you train?
  • ga02clrga02clr Posts: 11
    Is the pool you talk of with the rubbish staff the queen mother in victoria by chance?

    Sort your tumble turns out.... hit the last bit of wall left between them all and they soon move.
  • Oh God where do I begin.

    ROADS - we are not a 3rd world country (yet) is it beyond us to get a road surface that doesn't resemble one from Helmand !

    Drivers - yawn, but FFS some of the things I've seen over the last fortnight defy belief.

    Carbon - Surley it can't be that expensive to produce.

    Trick Bike Adverts - I only have so much discipline you know, sooner or later in a moment of weakness the inevitable is going t o happen.

    No Fin Rules - In pools, why.

    My Diary - Why are there only 7 days in a week. I've had a look and I really need about 9 to fit everything in. Example 5k swimathon 18.30 Saturday,1st Sprint Tri of year 8.30 Sunday. Perfect.

    That'll do for starters, I'll be back.
  • jonEjonE Posts: 1,113
    Competitors that take up too much room in an already cramped transition area
  • It'll soon only get worse when they start laying out pink picnic blankets and gas fired BBQ's
  • sportevesporteve Posts: 141
    traffic lights: who sets the timing on those? what is the point of everyone from every direction having red for minutes on end? ...and setting the lights fothe cyclistlanes so that they only go green once every 15 minutes for 3 secs...
    ..cant you see what you do? you 'make' us 'jump' lights....
  • BritspinBritspin Posts: 1,655
    I like breast stroking bikini babes....sorry, I am just saying....
  • sportevesporteve Posts: 141
    omg britspin i just realised that what i wrote reads a bit different than i intended!!!
    ....ok ok i can see the point.... and the attraction for that matter!
  • jonEjonE Posts: 1,113
    Britspin wrote:
    I like breast stroking bikini babes....sorry, I am just saying....
    Is that babes wearing bikinis swimming breaststroke or bikini wearing babes stroking breasts...........cold shower time or a roll in the snow me thinks.
  • shadowone1shadowone1 Posts: 1,408
    I had a rant of a similar nature of father and boy who swim all over the pool in every conceivable direction with no regards to other people who are swimming in a straight line.

    My rant also noted the lack of keep hairs sticking out of the side of the ridiculous speedo's in check.....
  • risris Posts: 1,002
    i was happily reading about the bikini babes and now i'm stuck with speedo-moustaches in my mind.
  • nivaghnivagh Posts: 595
    People who don't swim in straight lines or in the middle of the lane. There's a direction for a reason, you cretins!!!
  • jonEjonE Posts: 1,113
    nivagh wrote:
    in the middle of the lane.

    They could be following that nice solid black line that is on the bottom of the pool.
  • ZacniciZacnici Posts: 1,385
    Sporteve I must also complain about the breast stroking bikini babes - there just aren't any in our pool
  • sportevesporteve Posts: 141
    now now you boys! this was meant as a moaning corner for grumpy triathletes and look what my little mistake has done, it created a 'breast stroking babes fantasy' thread!
    so 'if you cant beat them join them' me thinks...breast stroking male babes anyone...?
    speedos welcome, no moustaches below the neck though
  • BritspinBritspin Posts: 1,655
    I have to disagree, bikini babes=breast stroke, man babes surely look best in freestyle...moustaches notwithstanding..
  • bulletbullet Posts: 115
    'breast stroking babes fantasy'

    Can I buy that on the web ?

    Pick up truck drivers ,too close , when you are cycling .(Or dickless wonders as I call them )

  • What about Breast Stroking bikini Twins???

    We have a set of Twins at my pool and they vary beween crop tops and bikinis.. certianly put me off my stroke!!!
  • sportevesporteve Posts: 141
    i have one more: pedestrians!
    pedestrians who cross anywhere, anyhow, anyway, pedestrians who think are too cool to speed up when they cross while red, pedestrians on the phone, pedestrians with hoodies who dont bother to check the road..ever
  • JellybabyJellybaby Posts: 180
    1. THE TWO BERKS LAST NIGHT SITTING AT THE END OF THE LANE DOING ONE LENGTH EVERY TEN MINUTES. IF YOU HAD PAID ATTENTION IN SCHOOL, YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE "FAST LANE" AND "CLOCKWISE" MEANT ON THE SIGN. IF YOU WANT TO DO THE LENGTH QUICKLY THAT'S FINE, BUT DON'T DO IT BACKSTROKE, AND FOLLOW THE F*CKING DIRECTION YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE GOING - IF YOU CAN'T GO BACKWARDS IN A STRAIGHT LINE (THOSE LINES ON THE CEILING ARE THERE FOR A REASON) WHEN THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE IN THE POOL THEN DON'T DO BACKSTROKE. NEITHER MYSELF NOR MY SWIMMING CHUM WANTED TO GRAB YOUR ARM BEFORE IT HIT US. NEXT TIME I'LL BE RATHER RUDER THAN I WAS LAST NIGHT.

    2. POOLSIDE ATTENDANTS (LIFEGUARD IS PROBABLY TOO GRAND A TITLE FOR YOU). IF PEOPLE ARE USING THE FAST LANE, THEN GET THOSE WHO ARE SITTING IN THE SHALLOW END TO MOVE INTO THE NEXT LANE WHERE ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE ARE SITTING IN THE SHALLOW END TOO. IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK GIVEN THAT YOUR HIGH CHAIR IS AT THE SHALLOW END OF THE POOL NEXT TO THE FAST LANE

    rant over
  • joolzdjoolzd Posts: 245
    You lot want to join a decent gym where they have a 'training' pool only!!!

    I'm just generally really grumpy when using the treadmill...just don't come near me is all I can say!!! Infact, the grumpy feeling and sighing usually starts as I enter the gym!!!

    Roll on spring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • JellybabyJellybaby Posts: 180
    Isn't a training pool the one that's about 50cm deep for toddlers?
  • Old people that swim next to each other in different lanes talking and then don’t let you past, There’s just no need for it. And to make it worst they get to swim for free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • md6md6 Posts: 969
    sporteve wrote:
    now now you boys! this was meant as a moaning corner for grumpy triathletes and look what my little mistake has done, it created a 'breast stroking babes fantasy' thread!
    so 'if you cant beat them join them' me thinks...breast stroking male babes anyone...?
    speedos welcome, no moustaches below the neck though
    eve you can stroke my breast if you like, or did you mean stroking people with your breasts? I'm ok with either
  • BritspinBritspin Posts: 1,655
    see...that wasn't even me, not in the room, nowhere close, can't be blamed...
  • ZacniciZacnici Posts: 1,385
    Of course
    so 'if you cant beat them join them' me thinks...breast stroking male babes anyone...?
    Can also mean males stroking other peoples (presumably female) breasts

    Sporteve, you really have to be careful with your postings - look what you've started.
  • BlinkybazBlinkybaz Posts: 1,144
    Please dont take this as sexist because it not meant this way1
    I cant stand middle aged women with perms holding on to the side trying to keep their hair dry in the middle of the fast lane.

    Not sure if its just women with perms but thats the ones that seem to plague me. :roll::roll::roll:
  • risris Posts: 1,002
    clearly you are a magnet for middle-aged perm chicks, blinky. they like a challenge so best not to fight it...
  • BlinkybazBlinkybaz Posts: 1,144
    It must be david hasselhoff appeal Ris!
    Living in somerset there seem to be perms still hanging around! Well you arent to far away and must have seem them around!
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