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Odd Situation - chimpanzee attack

Ok so heres the situation, your running around, cycling your bike, maybe setting up your brakes. Champanzee steps out of nowhere and looks at you. It moves to attack you.

What do you do?

This may seem totally random, ill explain afterwards.


  • recreational drugs are not for training, you need performance enhancers,[keep them in seperate box's]
  • nivaghnivagh Posts: 595
    Erm, chuck a banana at it?
  • shadowone1shadowone1 Posts: 1,408
    kick it in the teeth
  • risris Posts: 1,002
    stand still?

    put the video on youtube (i love this lololololol, that guy is a jerk etc)
  • huwdhuwd Posts: 228
    Some people might laugh but I'm sure this is a real risk for all those that do circuits around regents park past the zoo entrance.
  • You'd never guess it was Friday
  • FlavadaveFlavadave Posts: 749
    I would try and reason with it, suggest we should all just get along.

    And where can I get one of those bike riding monkeys! They're brilliant! Obviously they all inccured time penalties though as none of them have helmets on.
  • well the good news is, you can probably outrun it on your bike!

    general concensus is though that running is pointless - itll outrun you. climbing a tree is obviously out. fighting it...well it has 4 hands and is 5 x as strong as you are. better hope you got some bananas handy!

    The reason i asked is that some dude in america was in his kitchen eating some bacon and he turned around and guess what. chimpanzee. what did he do? he got mauled. the evil primate actually bit his tackle off. Scary stuff!
  • jasejase Posts: 47
    Monkey nuts or nuts monkey?
  • BritspinBritspin Posts: 1,655
    Another good reason...of many..to never cook bacon naked.
  • BlinkybazBlinkybaz Posts: 1,144
    If that cheek chip was in my face? I would have to bend his ear about the price of tri kit tell him all about my races and new trainers then practice some winter training a run like man in a banana suit with chimp chaseing!!!!
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