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What the books don't tell you

jonEjonE Posts: 1,113
Most Triathlon books impart 'Their' wisdom on the reader,on how to have the best race possible,but there are a couple of items that seem to be missing from their pages,which I have discovered over the years.As Good judgement comes from experience and experience generally comes from bad judgement,here are a couple of pearls of wisdom from a back of the pack competitor (competitor in the loosest sense).If Bopmofo and Blurred girl wish to put these in their 'Newbies guide' feel free.

1.Never let your bike take you somewhere your brain didn't reach 5 seconds earlier.

2.The 3 most useless things for a triathlete is the road behind them,one second ago,and the best race advice given to them just after crossing the finish line.

3.There are three things for a good race,unfortunately no one knows them.

4.The chances of forgetting an item of kit is directly proportional to the number of times your kit has been checked.

5.You only have too much nutrition and liquid when you have crossed the finish line.

6.If you wish to dispute the number of lengths you have some in excess to the required race number be prepared to have video evidence.

7.Triathlon is one of the few sports that allow you to career through a major city wearing just your underwear.

8.If it is not flourescent lycra,with gender enhancing panels then you have not been in the sport for longer than a decade.

9.It is(okay was) permissable for males to wear female one piece swimming costumes,this didn't last long as manufacturers saw an openning in the market.

10.Triathlon is a sport which also allows you to reduce your body hair to less than that of a Drag artiste with legitimate excuses(speed,massage,road rash etc)

The last four may lead me to the question of ...............

''Is Triathlon really a socially sanitised ,homo-erotic sport for the genderly confused''

But hey I love it.


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    jonEjonE Posts: 1,113
    Absolutely,Conehead.If I can think of others I am only too happy to drop you an e-mail or pm.

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    whats your book again conehead? im sure someone did once tell me but i forgot!! x
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    ah so i can put it on my christmas list!! [:)]

    i havent got many stories yet maybe - after this season!! although last season i got pushed off my ike by a drunk and then in my first tri i was tapping the woman's foot in front of me in the pool as per over taking etiquette but she didnt stop at the end of the lane for me to overtake so i had to bob along behind her doing breaststroke for nearly twelve of the lengths!!! quite frustrating...

    i would look foward to reading other peoples!! x
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    as im relatively new to this site, was interesting to see you had a book out conehead, so will be purchasing that soon!

    also had a quick look on your website, I love the recruitment section!!!
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    clarkey30clarkey30 Posts: 270
    Whats the website called conehead?
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