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oh dear, whoopsie daisies...
JoddyBear
Posts: 66
in General Chat
...or a string of un-typable expletives, whichever you'd prefer.
Managed to perform some fantastical aerobatics this morning on the ride into work by not quite turning into the corner enough. Struck the kerb almosy head on and vaulted myself over the front, through a huge nettle patch and into a chain link and barb wire fence.
Needless to say that the results were far more humiliating than painful, although my left shin is on fire from the nettles (why is there ne'er a dock leaf to be seen when you need one?) but of the queue of at least ten cars nearby only one bloke had the decency to even wind down his window for the cursory "Y'alright mate?" before disappearing off down the road.
I know it looked worse than it was. I know because i watched from above, floating overhead enjoying a birds eye view of my own near death experience. I know it looked totally fatal, but not a single driver rushed to my aid, no-one called an ambulance, they didn't shut the road to further traffic in order to recover my bike from the ditch, there was no investigation, and no interview from the local media to go out on tonights news broadcast.
I'm not entirely sure whether i feel totally unloved and uncared for as a cyclist at large, or if it's a personal feeling of loneliness induced by the fact that the other half couldn't even be bothered to jump in the tri-van to come and pick me up, but whilst i was stood wiping the claret off my arm and trying to remember when i last had a tetanus jab, i reflected that i haven't looked quite that stupid whilst falling off a bike since i was about seven or eight years old.
Still, at least nowadays i can make myself feel a little better by flying through the air screaming...
"Whoopsiedaisies......!"
Managed to perform some fantastical aerobatics this morning on the ride into work by not quite turning into the corner enough. Struck the kerb almosy head on and vaulted myself over the front, through a huge nettle patch and into a chain link and barb wire fence.
Needless to say that the results were far more humiliating than painful, although my left shin is on fire from the nettles (why is there ne'er a dock leaf to be seen when you need one?) but of the queue of at least ten cars nearby only one bloke had the decency to even wind down his window for the cursory "Y'alright mate?" before disappearing off down the road.
I know it looked worse than it was. I know because i watched from above, floating overhead enjoying a birds eye view of my own near death experience. I know it looked totally fatal, but not a single driver rushed to my aid, no-one called an ambulance, they didn't shut the road to further traffic in order to recover my bike from the ditch, there was no investigation, and no interview from the local media to go out on tonights news broadcast.
I'm not entirely sure whether i feel totally unloved and uncared for as a cyclist at large, or if it's a personal feeling of loneliness induced by the fact that the other half couldn't even be bothered to jump in the tri-van to come and pick me up, but whilst i was stood wiping the claret off my arm and trying to remember when i last had a tetanus jab, i reflected that i haven't looked quite that stupid whilst falling off a bike since i was about seven or eight years old.
Still, at least nowadays i can make myself feel a little better by flying through the air screaming...
"Whoopsiedaisies......!"
0
Comments
Are you and the bike fixable?
You meantion dock leaves. I have been in numerous situations with other people when they have been strung by the dreaded nettles. I have had to show all of them what a dock leaf looks like. This mostly happens on hill walks or maontain walking. I am really glad someone else knows what one looks like and that it actually works.
I hope you heal quick and it doesnt put you off the cycling on roads!
Glad you're OK.
don;t forget the copious amounts of spit to accompany the dock leaf!
didds
Hope you are alright and the bike is fixable.
Your story brought back some old memories for me that I wanted to share.
I won a bike from Monster Munch when I was about 14. It was a cracking bike, albiet it was bright pink but it looked really cool. This bike was either haunted or jinxed cause the amount of accidents I had on that bike were uncanny.
I was riding along the road heading home and I passed a car. Just as I passed the car the driver flung open his door only for me to smash straight into the door and through the window head first. To my total amazement the guy had his window down and I landed on the road with really sore hands. I was very lucky as I had no helmet.
The second time just a week after it I was going down a very steep hill and hit a pot hole at speed and flew over the handle bars and crashed into the road and really slammed my head hard onto the road. Had really severe concussion.
Well, on first occassion only the driver of the car was bothered about the accident and the second time not one person came to my aid. My brother who was travelling on another bike was the only person who helped.
Oh and the dam bike, not a thing wrong with it. It escaped unhurt with only minor ailments. I sold that bike not long after!!
The bike managed to come off almost totally unscathed, just a burst tube. It would have to be the day that I left in a hurry though because the new boss was starting in the office so i didn't bring a spare.
Gotta beg a lift into yeovil at lunchtime now to try and get it sorted before it's time to go home. I don't want to sit there in my friends car on the way back, looking out wistfully at the glorious somerset countryside on such a beautiful day, quite apart from the fact that i obviously need to practice my cornering [:D]
The magic only happens with a bit of spit!
btw, i too know what a dockleaf looks like and know that it works even though i'm a foreigner
Isn't that just adding insult to injury? If I crashed into a patch of nettles and someone ran over towards my undoing their flies, I would gladly tell them to #### off.
comanightrain might get quite excited though.
well that doesnt apply to you guys, so pee away!
it is thou ileagle to piss on yourself or any where else will in public (not toilets).
With this in mind I still opt for dock leaf and spit!
I am please to note 3 of us on this thread know whay a dock leaf looks like.
If I was techno enough I would post a picture!
ta da!
Your techno abilties are now marked and you have become my go to guy!
Just looking at those big crispy leaves makes me think of getting stung as a kid.[:)]
I might have to go and find some nettles to night! Last time I did encounter nettles they failed to sting me. I may be imune due to be stung to many times in my youth[:D]
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/226/482743081_bb697d4abe.jpg?v=1178210193
Scotty